Monday through Monday, hospital repetition

This week, my last week, was similar to every hospital day, or shall i say night. I stay up all night with Nicole to see if she silently coughs and needs suction, or be there so she doesn't freak out when the nurses turn her. Its all an over precaution, but, I feel without us, sometimes the nurses just aren't there, sometimes they take a hour and a half break at three in the  morning.  And yes sometimes Nicole wakes up in a coughing fit that no one can hear and it freaks her out, and she has no way of signaling someone.  This week Nicole's brain came back full swing, she was super attentive to everything that was going on, noises, what we were talking about, her situation. Her tube was finally taken out Tuesday and she was doped most of that day. The next three days were pretty tough, it seemed she was more aware and less doped up, which means not much sleep and worry. Wednesday night after the tube removal she stayed up all night, sleeping maybe 2 hours with a 102 degree fever. Her new Trachiatomy tube was really scaring her, she thinks that she can't breathe when the thing just pops off. The reason it pops off is because she is putting lots of breath behind it. It doesn't look like she is breathing very hard in her lungs but what she puts through her mouth is lots of push, you can almost hear her gurgling in her esophogus some words.  So, needless to say, the thing just popped out 4 times today, it freaked me out the first time too. All sorts of water who knows flew out too. Brenda and I just looked at each other and Nicole looked like death had just slappd her. She stayed up all night praying and saying she didn't want to die. I don't know how many times I had to tell her that she was almost dead two weeks ago, now, she was going to live and laughed at her. She made me hold her hand all night long. It was really hard, I literally had to pass my hand off to her mom the next morning. The rest of the week was about the same, trying to convince Nicole how far she had come and how well she was doing. The place was really starting to piss me off come Friday. So she has about 7 infections, they have her pumped for the last two weeks on all sorts of antibiotics, and now she is conscious of everything. I think Thursday night, we went upstairs to eat with Jordan and Chase on the Ledo deck and when we came back down, Nicole's temp had gone out of control, and infectious disease told us that all the antiobiotics had killed some of her good immune system blockers and she has a new infection called C-dif. This is some pungent clear diahrea that requires everyone to wear a gown at all times in the room and gloves and wash with a special soap afterwards.  I am beginning to think that there are all these bugs flying around and they are trying to keep her here infected to support their large Hospital bill. Over the weekend she started to have her temp come down at least close to 100 or less. That was great. I got to leave Saturday night and go hang and out with Carter, Jordan, and Chase, we got drunk and stayed up most the night. I slept Sunday as a break, got kinda sick. Hopefully not a mixture of food, drinking, and c-dif. It went away soon after. Nicole, Myself, and everyone else is just ready to break the routine of this damn hospital. It seems like we have worn or welcome out, or should be damn close to getting out of here.